Can we Get a Break!

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Charlie Perry

 

 

     During the year 2020-2021 Covid has modified substantially our lives , Here my point of view on it. 

 

     My experience of Covid was a mix of good things and bad things. Here’s why

 

     The first lock down, I was super happy of having two weeks of school off time to do focus on myself finishing things that were due to school and time to sleep. After, that we learn that we wouldn’t come back to school I didn’t really mind that much I was doing what me teacher were asking me too. It wasn’t that difficult. The only thing that was bugging me was that I couldn’t go to my sports that a was doing before. I had time to really focus on myself. I start working out every day to keep my shape because of the hoping that me sports would restart. Mentally I really did a check-up of myself. But nothing that was bad.

 

     The beginning of the year 2020-2021.I think that this year has been the most difficult year of my life mentally and physically. I hope it is the worst . I’m in secondary 3 so we start the year by going to school 100 % of the time. It was fun to see my friends every day. Not a long time after we learn that we would be one day out of two. It’s when the game start to begin. The teacher were really understandable about the situation. We certainly had a lot of homework but at the beginning it wasn’t that bad even tho I thought it was a lot and it’s wasn’t gonna be the more that we will be having. The organization was difficult too. The Activities outside of school were all close for everyone. The closest sport that I have were the swimming lesson that we had at the beginning of the year in physical education I was so happy about it because I used to go the the pool 2 or 3 times a weeks before Covid.

 

Half of the year:

     It was a it the same of the beginning. Everything close except school and the grocery store. We were all really tired of it. Tired of not seeing anybody except our family. Don’t get me wrong I love my family but a whole year with there were getting on my nerve. The only person that wasn’t getting on my nerve was my dog. It’s when I start to close myself up to everyone. School was starting to get really difficult. I had a lot of difficulty to keep up. Mentally, I think it’s there that it’s start to get really worse. I had more difficulties to hang-out with my friends. Christmas arrived Thanks god !!! We could see our friends outside and have a little pause of school to relax a little bit and recharge our batteries. Physically have was the best in shape that I’ve ever been working out everyday and walking everyday even running. 

 

After Christmas:

     So after Christmas as we except a other lock down. What a surprise ! School online 100% of the time for a time, you know its was okay. I was happy about getting up later and I was working out during lunch time. When I think about it workout is the only time where I forget every thing and I think it is what I’m searching, forgetting everything to be in peace. I think that again what was difficult was not seeing my friends and just being with my family. I’m working in a grocery store since may 2020 and it was the only place were I could socialize. I was seeing the face of the clients, colleagues and friends it was really difficult to see everybody so sad and hopeless. For me it was my time to shine , I was getting everything done. After a time , one day out of two again, the thing with school one day out of two is that every time you go to school you have a exam. It is really demotivating. I just didn’t wanted to go to the school anymore because school was meaning exam. Mentally its wasn’t going great and to be honest I don’t think I was the only one. My motivation start to degrade and my two favorite phrases were ‘’ f$%//? it’’ or ‘’ its doesn’t count I’m not doing it ‘’every homework that a was doing were late I was just to tired and had no motivation for anything. When you see yourself like that it is really difficult. It’s difficult to hear your friends asking you what’s going on with you and why you change like that when you don’t even know yourself what’s going on!

 

Right now :

     We are now at the end of the year , we just came back from one month of school online so that means that all the exam that we couldn’t do were push to the three last week of school. Mentally I’m not here anymore. I just do it but without the conscience that I’m doing it. After the month of school online , we had one or two exam a day. Everything that we were doing was evaluating event tough it’s not a exam it is evaluated. Now we are at school everyday but that doesn’t mean we don’t have exams everyday. You might be thinking like it’s normal it’s school but it is not normal that I don’t want to get up to go see my friends in the morning because of how exhausted I am. I sleep 8 hours a night,  I drink water everything but my body and head is not following anymore. I sleep every time I get to. I stop working out because I don’t have time anymore and the motivation to do it. My parents are legit scared of me right now. I’m scared of myself too. I’m now all close up I don’t talk a lot like I used to. I don’t have the joy of life anymore. I to be honest I’m not the only one. I talk to a lot of person in a day and everybody is so tired. We are all so exhausted. The charge of work that is put on us is so big that we don’t have motivation anymore. I’m looking forward to the end of the year so I can sleep during 3 days and relax.

 

    Covid had positive points too. I start to working out everyday and I am really proud of myself for it. I had time to focus on myself. I had time to think about my goals and questioning myself about what a really wanted to do with my life. This year is so tuff mentally. My mental has never been that bad I’m at the lowest that I’ve ever been and believe me when I said that I didn’t get a easy life . Bad habits has enter my life. I just don’t want to go to school anymore. Most of the time, I don’t have emotions anymore I have to fake them. The fact of not socializing anymore had the impact on me to not be able to socialize anymore. School for my is a torture because I have to talk to people, let them touch me and not just being by myself like I got used to and it is scary.